Sunday, November 17, 2019

Your Ex Boyfriend Doesn’t Want to Hurt You Again?

March 1, 2010 by  
Filed under Relationship Advice for Women

What does it mean when your ex boyfriend says he “doesn’t want to hurt you again”? This is without question one of the most confusing statements you will ever have to consider. Is it a warning that he can never fully commit to you? Is he saying he simply can’t control himself?

While every situation is different, most guys say this when they still care about how their ex feels about them. They don’t want to be accused of riding off into the sunset with their new girl while leaving you behind depressed and confused. But does this make the situation any more right? Not by most people’s standards. In fact many would consider it to be an excuse as opposed to a loving statement.

If you believe he “doesn’t want to hurt you again” then in essence you are admitting fault with yourself. Buying into the theory that your ex boyfriend has the power to hurt you shows an element of weakness on your part. You are in fact saying “yes he can hurt me…but he has cares enough about me to prevent it”. You are focusing on the fact that he still cares, but overlooking that he has chosen to leave you because he knows temptation will always be an issue in your relationship.

There is only one way to get your ex boyfriend back in this situation. You must first change your focus from defense to offense. Instead of protecting the last sliver of love that remains between you, you must charge ahead and develop a deeper attraction. Right now your relationship is likely stuck in “friends mode”…but you need it to become much more passionate. His temptations will not be an issue if you can satisfy his whole body and mind.

A man like this who is both protective and unsatisfied needs direction. The fact that he still sees positive qualities in you is promising. However, deep inside this is a man who is looking to be controlled. He wants love to direct him, and if you cannot feed his needs enough to keep him focused on your relationship then he will indeed hurt you again and again.

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Your Ex Boyfriend Doesn’t Want to Hurt You Again?

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