Friday, December 6, 2024

Did you scare your boyfriend away?

June 18, 2007 by  
Filed under Relationship Advice for Women

Everyone goes through some soul searching after dealing with a breakup. You wonder what went wrong and if there was something more you could have done to change the outcome. One thing to consider during this reflection time is to ask yourself if you actually scared your boyfriend away? This is not that uncommon and here are some common examples.

Commitment Pressure
No one likes to think that they put more into a relationship than they get out of it, but if you value your boyfriend, then you have to be careful. You can actually have the opposite effect by making demands for an engagement or more of his time. Guys can be like wild animals at times, and the more you cage them up the more they want to be free. Subtle hints at commitment are OK, but it should be a natural occurrence instead of a forced response.

Criticism
Similar to the commitment issue, guys like to feel empowered and confident. Thus, the more you bicker about their hair, clothes, or social activities the more they become turned off. The best approach is to compliment them when they do something you like, and keep your criticism to a minimum.

Too Much ____ (insert just about anything here)
There is such a concept of too much of a good thing, especially when it makes your boyfriend feel uncomfortable. This includes public displays of affection and time spent together. You want to be “wanted” – not “uninvited”. Increase the value of your affection with a little bit of hard-to-get. You’ll find that guys enjoy the hunt even more than the kill.

The bottom line is that you can scare away a good relationship even if you didn’t mean to. Take a look at your yourself and your actions when analyzing your breakup. Were you too aggressive with the situations listed above? If so, it should be easy to recognize and correct. Make yourself more attractive to him by toning it down a notch. By doing this you will effectively turn the tables on the situation by making him want you back.

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Did you scare your boyfriend away?

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